Faint with love!

Wouldn't it be incredible if your wife was overwhelmed with love for you? Can you imagine if her love for you was so overwhelming that it made her woosy? Well, before you delete this in disbelief, at least hear me out. I'm not referring to a constant state of woosiness, but rather an overarching satisfaction and a steady warm, wonderful feeling toward you.

In Song of Songs, we have a contrast of the woman's experience with significant men in her life. First, in SOS1:6, her brothers related to her in anger and neglect. This left her feeling hurt, insecure, unloved and devalued.

Then, in SOS 2:3,4, she describes her experience with her soon to be husband. She says that he is like an apple tree. She loves to sit in his shade. Her brothers forced her out into the harshness of the hot,sweltering sun with no relief, but he provides shade for her and apples to nourish her. Not only that, but he has taken her to the banquet hall for a great feast to celebrate her presence in his life and has publicly declared his love for her. She has gone from mistreatment and lack of love to being cared for and heralded as the love of his life. All this has made her faint...woosy...with love for him!

I don't know about you, but that's how I want to be in the life of my wife. The question is,"How do we get there?"

First of all, we have all made terrible mistakes, so a good place to start is to identify those and determine to stop making those mistakes. Maybe some apologies would be in order if these mistakes have been left as gaping wounds in the relationship.

Next, ask her to tell you what makes her feel especially loved by you. Ask and listen, you might be surprised. Whatever she says...believe it...even if you don't understand it. Start doing those things.  

Next, be thoughtful of her and show your love for her when you are out in public (as well as in private). For example, hold her hand often, walk by her side not far up ahead, smile at her, minimize cell phone conversations when you are with her and pay attention to her.

Every day give her hugs and kisses, tell her how much you love her, tell her how pretty she is, and look her in the eye and tell her that you will never leave her.

These are some great ideas to start with. I'm sure you will think of many ways to build on this in your quest to make your wife "love to sit in your shade". Who knows, maybe she will have a few woosy moments too!

                  

   For more ideas to help boost your marriage, order our book, I Still Do.

The husband's challenge!

In Ephesians 5:25-33, there is an example given to guide husbands as they interact with their wives. The example is that of Jesus laying down His life in order to do what is best for His Bride, the church. The term "church" was not intended to refer to buildings or religious organizations. The term church here refers to every person who becomes a born again follower of Jesus. This is personal for every follower of Jesus. He is involved in your life and has a plan to accomplish what is best for you from an eternal viewpoint. He has paid a high price to free us from bondage to the kingdom of darkness and now He goes to a lot of trouble to walk with us and care for us and bring us to higher, better places in our relationship with Him and our service for Him. He watches over us and takes care of us. What a great feeling!

Likewise, husbands are to relate to their wives in the same way. Husbands should be loving, caring, and understanding as we relate to our wives. Husbands are not to dominate and control their wives, but instead we should love and cherish them with honor and dignity. We should lift them up.

I know some of you are already thinking of all the things you would like to do for your wife but can't due to some uncontrollable obstacle. Stop worrying about that and focus your thoughts on what you are able to do today and plan to do it.

Some are thinking of buying some extravagant gift. Do not get trapped into thinking that wives are only focused on gifts and material things. What she really wants is your heart. If you can't afford to buy things, don't get depressed about it. Focus on giving her love, affection, and kindness. Things come and go. Focus on what really matters...love.

At this point some might be tempted to respond,"but what about me?", but in God's plan, caring for the woman will bring great rewards. We are rewarded by the reciprocated love of the wife and by the blessing of God on our families. This is an opportunity to impact our children and grandchildren with a wonderful example that will fill our family line with blessing!

Like great men through the ages, we can follow Jesus and make a difference that will have a positive impact for generations!

                  

   For more ideas to help boost your marriage, order our book, I Still Do.