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| Anger can be like wild fire! |
Anger is a complex emotion. I suppose there is no need to try to explain or define it because we all know it well.
Anger has motivated people to leave their comfort zones to take a stand for right and good causes. However, too often, anger is the emotion that runs out of control like a wild fire damaging and destroying everything in its path. I wonder how many marriages/families have been destroyed by anger?
The Bible has a lot to say about anger. In 1 Corinthians 13 we read that love is not easily angered. Too often, we experience the opposite of that in the marriage context. So many are careful to control their angry outbursts around co-workers, supervisors, strangers, and friends while giving themselves permission to be touchy, explosive, and hurtful to their husband/wife and children.
It is clear that we are capable of controlling how we vent our anger. Shouldn't we choose to express love to our mate and children by extending that same courtesy to them. It is time to make better choices. No one can change the past, but we can all change the future.
In Ephesians 4:26, we are told to not sin in our anger. It is not wrong to be angry, however the way we handle our anger is very important to God....and those around us. Angry words and explosive actions destroy love and ruin the harmony needed to have a healthy relationship. I know that many joke about the joy of making up after a fight, but there is always the residual erosion caused by careless words thrown around in an angry fit. Over time, these can build up and create distance and uncertainty in the relationship.
Anger has motivated people to leave their comfort zones to take a stand for right and good causes. However, too often, anger is the emotion that runs out of control like a wild fire damaging and destroying everything in its path. I wonder how many marriages/families have been destroyed by anger?
The Bible has a lot to say about anger. In 1 Corinthians 13 we read that love is not easily angered. Too often, we experience the opposite of that in the marriage context. So many are careful to control their angry outbursts around co-workers, supervisors, strangers, and friends while giving themselves permission to be touchy, explosive, and hurtful to their husband/wife and children.
It is clear that we are capable of controlling how we vent our anger. Shouldn't we choose to express love to our mate and children by extending that same courtesy to them. It is time to make better choices. No one can change the past, but we can all change the future.
In Ephesians 4:26, we are told to not sin in our anger. It is not wrong to be angry, however the way we handle our anger is very important to God....and those around us. Angry words and explosive actions destroy love and ruin the harmony needed to have a healthy relationship. I know that many joke about the joy of making up after a fight, but there is always the residual erosion caused by careless words thrown around in an angry fit. Over time, these can build up and create distance and uncertainty in the relationship.
Try these helpful tips to control anger:
- Assure yourself that you can control yourself.
- Revoke the permission you have given yourself to rage out of control.
- Remember that rants of rage are a sin Galatians 5:20.
- Seek God's forgiveness and help.
- When you feel the anger building, be careful.
- Choose your words and actions carefully. Think about how your words will affect your mate or children. Say what you need to say in a loving way to effect a helpful response rather than a simple dumping of your anger.
- Explain that you need to take a break if necessary. Don't just storm out without explanation.
- Try listening without speaking until you understand your mate's position.
- Ask questions to improve your understanding before you blow up. Don't blow up.
- Remember, love and peaceful communication glorify God and bless your family. A wonderful gift.
- Refuse to participate in the old patterns of escalation. Simply sit and listen if your mate is raging. Wait for calmness to prevail.
- Be careful not to provoke your mate or escalate the anger. Real Love is not easily angered!
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