Sunday, June 12, 2011

Real Leadership


Ever since Adam chose to step back and watch Eve eat the forbidden fruit rather than step forward and lovingly lead her away from the serpent's suggestion men have struggled to step forward in their families.

There was a terrible price for Adam's choice to step back. There is a price to pay today also. This price includes the loss of self respect, loss of the respect of our wives, negative consequences of wrong choices made by our children due to a lack of instruction, and sometimes negative consequences from wrong choices made by wives due to a lack of input from husbands. Our society is suffering because men are stepping back.

Men tend to step back for lots of reasons, but I suppose the most common are that they are led to believe that after giving their best at work they believe that they have earned a pass at home. The problem is that being involved in home life is the most important factor. Another reason men offer is that they want to avoid any conflict that their input might create so they sit idly by as their family struggles. Some men feel that they lack the spiritual understanding to offer solid Biblical counsel to their wives and children. I'm sure there are other reasons given, but these seem to be the most common.

The truth is that God has appointed the husband to provide spiritual leadership in the family. Make it your goal to get involved and step forward in your family to honor God and protect your family. Here are some helpful ideas:
  • Strengthen your relationship with God through Bible reading, prayer, and Christian fellowship.
  • Make it your practice to base all your choices and decisions on obedience to God's Word and leading.
  • Make it a point to explain this process to your children. Include an explanation of right and wrong according to the Bible in any discipline administered. This helps them develop are solid decision making process for themselves. 
  • Get involved emotionally with your wife. Pray with her and discuss God's will in your lives regularly.
  • Make it a point to be a loving leader pointing the family toward God not a harsh dictator enforcing a set of rules.
  • Strive to live what you teach and seek forgiveness when you fail.   
I once asked a group of men at church if they would step forward and intervene to keep their wives from going down a wrong road with terrible circumstances. Specifically, the terrible mistake was defined as participating in a gossip campaign that would destroy a woman in the church, disrupt her marriage and children, and create division in the church as it destroyed friendships. Nearly all of them said that they would look the other way rather than risk the fallout from intervening...avoiding the conflict was more valuable than avoiding the consequences of a terrible mistake (sin).  
The world, especially the church world is in desperate need of husbands who provide loving leadership.  

God has equipped us men, let's choose to step forward!                    
   For more ideas to help boost your marriage, order our book, I Still Do.

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